Song of Inspiration: Don’t Trust No Ni&&a by Khia

So I am sitting in the coffee shop… at the counter overlooking the porch….in front of the big window….by myself…just looking around. First, I look around the coffee shop….at no one in particular although a few people stand out. The elderly couple, in the corner to my left, who are softly talking to each other and sipping their drinks. Then there is the guy, by the door, on his computer. He looks like he may be busy typing but his mischievous smile makes me think he is on Facebook. Then, I look through the window with the mesh drawn shade at the empty covered porch. I notice a woman sitting at a table, amongst the mini palm trees. (Do you feel like you’re here?)

To the average customer, I probably look like I am taking in the scenery or even thinking about something of great importance. Well….the latter is true. I am trying to figure out which stranger I can trust to watch my precious pink covered MacBook while I run to the bathroom. After all, I am trying to avoid packing up my items just to unpack it when I get out the restroom. Now this may not seem important to you, but it is to me. Especially considering I am nursing a dangerously full bladder! Dangerous enough where I am about to ask the elderly couple to watch my computer but…too late. They get up and start working to the door. (Sigh!) Now I have to hope that my boo shows up before…well I am sure you get the point.

In an effort to distract myself and avoid thinking about waterfalls, I open ITunes and pop in my earphones. I can’t seem to settle on a particular artist, so I choose a song that will get me hyped…”Can’t Wang Wit It” by Khia. Now that is my jam and always brings me back to the silly days of college. As my full bladder becomes a distant memory, the song of inspiration starts playing. First, I hear Khia fussing out her female friend followed by the catchy beat. Talk about an intro! Can you say random? Can’t you just picture the character Angela from “Why Did I Get Married?” in the booth spitting the rhymes?

Anyhoo, as I bob my head to the beat, I listen to the lyrics. I mean really listen to the lyrics and the song makes me wonder… it really brainless to trust a man? I mean is it point blank dim-witted for a woman to trust the man whom she shares her heart and body? Or does it depend on the guy, the type of relationship you have with the guy, your past and present experiences with the guy or the context of a particular situation?

SIDENOTE: as I am pondering the question the guy by the door sneaks out. Dadgummit…now who will watch my computer because while Khia’s song is making me think, its not doing anything for my 98.9% full bladder. Ooops…sorry…I digress as usual.

Back to the question: is a woman dim-witted for a woman to trust her guy? Well, based on the song I would conclude Khia would say yes but my full bladder and I are in disagreement. I think the belief that you can’t trust a guy you share your body and/or heart with is the problem with relationships. You can’t say point blank, men can’t be trusted. And you can’t let your past situation dictate your current approach to Mr. New Boo. And frankly if there is no trust, there shouldn’t be any special activities going on but that’s another song and another article.

Okay, let me clarify. Trust should be earned, not blindly given to every Tom, Dick and Harry that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside. If he treats you right, treats you with respect and hasn’t given you a reason to doubt him, then you should give the guy a chance. A serious chance…not a “one foot in the door, one foot out the door ‘cuz I know you ‘bout to mess up ‘cuz you are a M.A.N” chance. If you can’t do that, then let the man be! Let him be with a woman that will give him that chance!

Khia raps “they are all dogs, that’s what they do!” Actually not all men, there are some good guys out there. Keep that in the fore front of your mind as you approach a new relationship or decide whether to stay with your current significant other. As the old lady on the train in “Coming to America” said, “Go on honey, give him a chance!” While you ponder my words, I am back on the hunt for a babysitter for my precious MacBook. Why, you may wonder? Because, “you can’t trust no full bladder!”

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